he will not prevail.

As I knelt on a trash bag, precisely laid against the floorboard, I scrubbed.  The once-white hard-bristled brush was now covered in chemicals and the spores of a black mold that had grown overnight on a small portion of the wall.  I WILL eliminate this if it's the last thing I do is all that was running through my mind.  The flowery scarf tied around my head blocked the spores from entering my mouth and nose, and the gloves on my hands protected my skin.

The "get rid of black mold" supply list.

Earlier, I carefully poured several solutions of various combinations of vinegar, hydrogen peroxide and baking soda on my brand new mattress.  I was exhausted after a busy weekend at work and all I wanted to do when I arrived home was to lay down and sleep.  The smell of cat urine was pungent as I nearly laid my head on the now-contaminated pillow.  The questions raced:  Why this?  Why now?

Today I carefully took a bucket of bleach water and, square by square, scrubbed the linoleum floor.  All I wanted was to be free from the filthy residue from the dirty water that regularly poured itself from the rusted pipes.  Thanks to the handiwork of a plumber, the pipes are fresh and new and the water stays inside of them as it was always meant to.

And I remembered.  I remember the words of a post I wrote just last week that fully centered on hope and staying positive.  I wrote, "Why not look at the positive, see the possibility for redemption in the brokenness of our shattered lives?"  Oh goodness, how easily I forget in the day to day.

The enemy comes to steal, kill, and destroy.  I know this to be true.  But what the devil means for harm, the Lord makes good.

This weekend at work, we took the residents to another conference, this one in Springfield, Missouri.  The way that the speakers proclaimed truth and the power with which they encouraged that particular body of women, well, I left with a renewed passion for a long-forgotten dream that God placed in my heart years ago.  I will write more about that some other time, but my point here is that God did something in me this weekend, and the only way the devil could retaliate was by making me frustrated, yet again, by my living situation.

He will not prevail.  My God is bigger.

Timely, how this negative attitude came over me right after writing about optimism.  It is as if that very piece of me was tested this week by various things.  I was asked, "What about if this happens, will your hope be crushed?  What about now when life get messy?  Will you still find the positive?  Then let's hit you with more and see if that is enough to crush you."

He will not prevail.  My God is bigger.